Skip to main content

Random Joke: Computer Diagnosis

One day Bill complained to his friend that his elbow really hurt. His friend suggested that he go to a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything quicker and cheaper than a doctor.
''Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it. It only costs $10." Bill figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The computer started making some noise and various lights started flashing.

After a brief pause out popped a small slip of paper on which was printed: "You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water. Avoid heavy lifting. It will be better in two weeks."

Later that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this machine could be fooled. He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog and urine samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off, he masturbated into the concoction. He went back to the drug store, located the machine, poured in the sample and deposited the $10.

The computer again made the usual noise and printed out the following message. "Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. Your dog has worms. Get him vitamins. Your daughter is using cocaine. Put her in a rehabilitation clinic. Your wife is pregnant with twin girls. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer. And if you don't stop jerking off, your tennis elbow will never get better."

Comments

Anonymous said…
Thanks for the informative information - I enjoyed reading it! I always enjoy this blog. :) Cheers, video-of-human-birth.com

Popular posts from this blog

Noy Nombor Bipod Shonket: Film Review

Another venture by renowned Humayun Ahmed. The film is a 100% meaningless movie. But this is not a drawback of the movie. Although the movie is completely meaningless, it does bring a lot of laughter. Good movie to kill idle time. Rating 6 out of 10. হূমায়ুন আহমেদের চলচ্চিত্র 'নয় নম্বর বিপদ সংকেত' তাঁর পরিচালিত অগনিত অর্থহীন ছবিগুলোর মধ্যে অন্যতম। অর্থহীন হলেও ছবিটি দর্শকদের মনে হাসির খোরাক জোগাবে। প্রথমদিকে ছবির গল্প খুবই এলোমেলোভাবে শুরু হলেও ছবিটি শেষ পর্যন্ত্য উপভোগ্য হয়েছে।

Challenges posed by globalisation in operations management of a global company

1. Introduction Globalisation of organisations is a phenomenon that has received much attention and been extensively discussed at cultural levels as well as at market and business levels. A company is considered global when more than half of its revenue comes from outside its home continent. (Gabrielsson, 2006) In any globalisation process, distribution of goods and services between and within international industrial and consumer markets is of great importance. Globalisation removes the tangible and intangible borders. The intangible borders being the cultures and norms. Globalisation of markets and reorganization of distribution are mutually dependent processes that involve changes in market structures. Contemporary examples of this are the emergence of global supply chains, internationalisation of wholesale, retail and transportation firms and the development of sales via the Internet. In this discussion, the nature of the challenges in creating and maintaining interdependence betwe

Habib - Bhalo Bashbo (Lyrics)

I am addicted to this song.The song is by Habib Wahid who sung it for the movie 'Hridoyer Kotha'. Amazing song. I have been listening to the song for last one week day in day out and still can't get enough. I have had numerous requests to translate the meaning of the lyrics. I am not a poet/lyricist, therefore, I am not confident enough to translate such a lovely piece of work in English. Below is the transliteration of lyrics of the Song. Bhalo Bashbo re bondhu tomay jotone Amar moner ghore chander alo chuiya chuiya pore Pushe rakhbore bondhu tomay jotone Dudhe alta gayer boron rup je kancha shona Anchol diya dhaika raikho chokh jeno pore na Ami prothom dekhe pagol hoilam Monto aar mane na Kache aisho bondhu premer karone Bhalo baisho re bondhu amay jotone Nishi bhore jonak nache monero gohin bone Shopno dekhao bondhu tumi niguro alingone Tomay maya dilam shohag dilam nilam apon kore Pashe thakbore bondhu tomar karone Bhalo bashbore bondhu tomay jotone ভালোবাসবো বাসবো রে